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Sunday, June 29, 2008

They were pummelling my nose while I pushed a cart through the supermarket parking lot tonight. (Actually, I went to two supermarkets tonight, and they attacked my nose at both of them.) Walking through the beer aisle, I thought of my dad and how he liked Henry Weinhardt beer. That was his favorite. I also thought of my dad when I was at Home Depot over the weekend--in particular, when walking near the lumber. The smell of sawdust always brings back memories of my dad and working with him at jobsites. He was a general contractor and a damn good one too.

It was my dad's birthday on June 5th. My mom's birthday is in April--April 20th. Mine is the 28th of April. My mom used to say she wanted to give birth to me on her birthday but that I was stubborn and wanted to wait eight days. Her father's birthday was on April 16, and I think my sister recently told me that both her children were also born in April.

I was born April 28, 1968, five days after Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated. It was a tumultuous time then and it's a tumultuous time now. I've been hearing lots of news about how the Mexican drug gangs are out of control in Ciudad, Mexico, gunning down people all over the city. It's such a shame. There's so much violence and crime in the world. I am a member of Amnesty International and constantly getting emails about torture and intimidation taking place all over the world. What a shame that human beings have to be their own species' worst enemy.

I was going to make a separate blog called "R-Blog" for regular blog, where I would talk about aspects of my life not related to activism or human rights or torture. Topics such as everyday life and humor and such. But I think I might just mix it in here. Usually my daily postings aren't too long anyway, and I will try to separate long threads with titles.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Last night they attacked the left side of my head for long periods of time and I think all would have been lost (my brain would have overheated and I would have become irrational again) if not for the fact that I had set up the "steel fort" and was sleeping in it. I think it really saved me. (See my TI blog for those interested in the details of the steel fort and such.)

Also, and I don't know if it's because of the shots to the brain or the sleep deprivation, but I began to relive old memories (have flashbacks) in my mind while lying down unable to sleep, and I remembered some more experiences that may be relevant to the question, "What does their directed-energy weapon look like?"

On one occasion on Long Island, New York, about 10 years ago, I was at a restaurant sitting at a table across from a young couple (a man and a woman) whom I did not know. They started laughing and staring and me, and they had in their hands what looked like some sort of handheld video or MP4 player or such (I couldn't get a good look at it). They looked at this device (and pressed some buttons and such) and then at me, and suddenly I felt a powerful "shot" of directed energy right to my groin area. I did not react, but watched them as they suddenly pulled a satchel-type bag out from under the table they were sitting at, got up and walked out. Now, it's hard to know exactly what they did, if anything, but it's possible that the handheld device was a monitor for some sort of thermal-imaging camera and also a remote trigger for a portable directed-energy weapon (DEW) that they fired at me. Both the weapon and camera would have had to be in that satchel. There was only shot fired at me so that seems more in line with something that is carryable in a satchel. A satchel is a cloth type bag that stretches so it's hard for me to describe its size, but it was certainly was big enough to hold a cubic foot of space, and it probably could have held more than that. It looked like it contained something bulky and resembling a box or cube. (Of course, the bag's material was opaque and I could not see inside the bag to determine its true contents.)

Two other occasions also re-occurred to me. Also in the late 90's (96? 97?) I was with a friend of a friend of a friend who had this rather large pen. It appeared that as I turned to walk away, he pointed it at the back of my head and fired a directed-energy shot at the back of my head. Again, it was just one shot, but perhaps again it was a portable weapon? It seems pretty high-tech but is not so far-fetched if think about it as some kind of portable, chemical-based laser or such (maybe it could even use a small amount of radioactive material?). Again we have to consider that U.S. military technological know-how is behind these weapons, and they have the kinds of resources and money to fund such projects. On still another occasion (in 2000-2001) a strange came up to me in a store with what looked like a pager or cell phone, held it up to the back of my head (I actually turned around and caught a glimpse of him aiming it me after he did it) and fired a directed energy shot (again, just one shot) at the back of my head. At least this much is true: on both occasions, strangers had what looked like ordinary objects, pointed them at me, and I felt a shot at the back of my head and noticed either before or just after that they were "pointing" the object at me.

Friday, June 27, 2008

More vicious attacks on my heart and nose by a U.S. government that has lost its mind and its way. The attackers also show complete disregard with how close the directed energy beam comes to my eyes on its way to my nose, and are thereby also injuring my eyes and vision, possibly permanently. The damage to my heart may be permanent as well.

I ask all Americans with any shred of a conscience to think twice before going to work within the U.S. military-industrial complex, which includes both government agencies and defense contractors. As for those wishing to become soldiers, know that you may deployed in unnecessary wars (e.g., Iraq) and to do unconscionable acts in direct contradiction with your own high morals. You may join out of patriotism but be used for acts of barbarism. This is how far America has fallen from grace. America will not mature as a country until enough people with consciences take a stand.

America's shameful history of human experimentation, which continues to this day

Just one example of America's military-industrial complex experimenting on unwitting civilians is a program that was called MK-ULTRA. While the official line is that it has stopped, in fact that are many such as myself who believe that it continues, under the same or possibly different name, if for no other reason that we ourselves are being attacked with weapons and technologies inline with MK-ULTRA's goals.

We may well never know the full extent of depravity of MK-ULTRA because the CIA director at the time, Richard Helms, took great pains to destroy all evidence and documentation of the 20+ year program of experimentation on American citizens. Despite this treachery, he was buried in Arlington Cemetary. So corrupt has America become.

You can read what few but shocking details we do know about MK-ULTRA here:

Project MK-ULTRA (http://www.answers.com/mkultra)

Richard Helms (http://www.answers.com/topic/richard-helms)

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Twenty shots to the heart, ten to the left brain, and countless to my nose. It is my prayer that someday these criminals with possession of military technology are brought to justice and tried to the fullest extent of the law. I would extend to them the full rule of law and due process that I myself am never given. They are the truest criminals by definition of the word.

The government laments lack of engineers working for the military

Here is an article I saw yesterday: Top Engineers Shun Military (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/25/us/25engineer.html?pagewanted=1&ei=5087&em&en=870fce2ca23a1442&ex=1214625600)

What's interesting is that they attribute the problem almost entirely to the lack of competitive salaries; in other words, they portray the problem as simply one of money. Never mind that our military might is used to torture people in Abu Ghraib, deprive people of any shred of due process in Guantanamo, rendition people, experiment on people, and otherwise debase and make a mockery of the Constitution and rule of law and everything that America is supposed to be about. Could it be that there are actually intelligent, scientifically-bent people with a conscience who may not feel good working for a military/defense industry that has fallen so far from the principles and ideals our great country was founded on?

Another example of how once-great America is becomimg a police state

Unbelievable but apparently true: Laptop Searches in Airports Draw Fire at Senate Hearing
(http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/26/washington/26airports.html?_r=1&ref=us&oref=slogin)

Watch out when you return from your next trip abroad--airport agents now have the right to search your laptop's hard disk without just cause. In other words, simply because they want to or suspect you for any reason, they can now search your laptop's contents. How very scary our country has become.

China being heavy-handed before Olympic Games

Another depressing news story: Activists Warned on Olympic Protests (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/26/world/asia/26china.html)

It's really too bad that China cannot see the light when it comes to human rights. These kinds of tactics are exactly what I experienced in Beijing when I was there from 11/06-11/07. Read the article. They are not simply preventing riots; they are preventing any dissenter's ability to express himself/herself, they are forbidding them to even come to Beijing or petition any problem during the Olympic Games. So instead of the Olympics ushering in a new era of human rights in China, it is instead just another cause for whose sake China will trample human rights.

We all understand China's need to prevent riots and keep order, but to quell all dissent and prevent free migration of its citizens are the acts of a totalitarian regime, not those of a "socialism with Chinese characteristics," as they are apt to call themselves. Perhaps instead of trying to quell all dissent, which does not solve any problems underlying that dissent, perhaps China could set up a special forum so that the petitioners could have their grievances heard and debated in a peaceful manner. As for telling its own citizens not to talk to foreign journalists, this is not something that a human-rights-respecting nation does. If China has nothing to hide, then there is no need to stifle the opinions and speech of its citizens. If not, let citizens vent their problems into the world's dialogue and thereby bring about positive change. It is China's need to control, gag, imprison and otherwise stifle dissent that prevents positive change and furthers totalitarianism.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Last night while trying to sleep they shot me again in the left side of my head and also in the back of my head. And I also experienced stronger and more sustained seizures on both the left and right sides of my head than I have experienced in a long time, again while lying down. And of course they continue to do plenty of nose attacks.

The declassified DoD papers mentioned yesterday

The document has been verified by many sources and is real. Unfortunately what isn't mentioned in the papers is not just the feasibility and effects of such weapons, but that the government has actually built them and was and still is testing them on innocent civilians such as myself who never gave them permission to do so. At least I think I didn't!! No one ever, ever said to me, Mike, we're going to use you as a human guinea pig: sign here. But now I'm wondering: When I was 20 or so I went to work for a temp agency that placed me at Ford Aerospace, a defense contractor. If I remember correctly, the lady at the temp agency had me sign some papers so I could work there. I thought it was just an oath to uphold the Constitution, defend America and such. Is it possible they could have surreptitiously put in language that made me a human guinea pig for horrifying experiments for the last twenty years? If so, this is completely and totally corrupt. Absolutely morally bankrupt if this was done to me. Such a "signing up for torture" needs to be explained verbally and made clear as a bell if that is what's going on. Anyway, I don't know if that's what happened, but the thought has occurred to me.

The DoD document speaks for itself. It is disgusting and misguided and everything America should not be. If I was tricked into being a human guinea pig, that is even more disgusting. Still more disgusting is, I believe, the fact that all this underlies a US government that is run by corrupt mafia types for their own personal gain and power, not for the benefit of American citizens. With such corruption at the top, it is no wonder we have corrupt scientists doing corrupt research and conducting heinous experiments on innocent American citizens.

I advise everyone to think twice before joining a defense-related firm or the military here in America, and be sure to read the fine print they make you sign. America's military is sick right now and needs to be made well again before citizens with a conscience can join it again and feel good about doing so.

And I ask the legislators of our great country to look into the disgusting research being discussed in this document and to once and for all put an end to the devevolpment and testing of all directed-energy weapons. While the potential for good of some of the weapons is there, the potential for torture and abuse far outweighs the potential for good. Please put a stop to this. Innocent people are suffering. Apparently, MK-ULTRA isn't really over. This was another phase in American history (not very long ago) when the American government (via the CIA) surreptitiously tortured American citizens by unknowingly giving them LSD and using other chemical, biological and (there it is!) radiological (e.g., directed energy) means to do research related to mind control.

MK-ULTRA was during the Cold War. News flash: Because you are afraid, that does not give you the right to do heinous things to American citizenry. Torturing 1 to save 1000 is NOT good logic. Torturing 1 to save 10,000,000 is NOT good logic. Why? Because there is no way you can know that outcome ahead of time. Nobody can. You are not God. Your position in our government doesn't make you God. You do not have the knowledge to know that torturing 1 or 100 will save 250,000,000 lives. There are too many facts to know before anyone could come to even a semblance of a rational decision in that regard. No one but God could know enough to make that decision. You cannot simply turn human suffering, torture, experimentation and weapons development into an equation like "100 is less than a million" because that is not how the complicated world works. To give the very tiniest example, think about Jonas Salk. What if he was one of the people you decided to torture? Then he would not have been healthy, would not have invented the Polio vaccine, and millions would have died as a result. YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY NO RIGHT OR JUSTIFICATION TO TORTURE ANYONE IN THE NAME OF ANYTHING. I don't care how high you raise the Flag when you do it; I don't care how many "semper fi's" you say when you explain it. And they can bury you in Arlington when you die, but you'll be the most un-American traitor that ever lived.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

They shot at my heart about 25 times since my post yesterday, most of which was when I was lying down trying to sleep. They also did a lot of nose attacks.

Disgusting if it's true

The below link and PDF appear to be some recently declassified information relating exactly to the development of directed-energy weapons purportedly for the wonderfully altruistic use of having a "less-than-lethal" weapon. (Of course, what this means in reality is that in fact you are developing weapons of torture because it does not kill the target and yet it hurts him or her in some way. Let me translate for you, so we're all clear: Less-than-lethal weapon = very capable torture weapon.) However, I have not had time to verify the source, so I cannot vouch that this is for real. I would like to corroborate the sources, but at least one source appears to be Popular Science magazine. That still doesn't mean this is for real, so approach it cautiously. If it is real, it sheds some light on how corrupt our mafia-run government has really sunk. Some of the technology and effects described therein seem to be congruent with some of the symptoms I experience.

The Army's Telepathic Ray Gun (http://www.popsci.com/military-aviation-space/article/2008-03/army%E2%80%99s-telepathic-ray-gun)

Download the full document in PDF form here.

Update: Here is a second source (New Scientist magazine):

US Army Toyed with Telepathic Ray Gun (http://technology.newscientist.com/channel/tech/dn13513-us-army-toyed-with-telepathic-ray-gun.html?feedId=online-news_rss20)

It's important that you download and read the whole document, because it is the latter sections/technologies that appear to be technology equal to or similar to what they are using on me. I have never experienced any "telepathy" effects although there are civilians who say that they have experienced such things, and to horrible effect. As for the heating, the "red" markings, confusion, aggression, and seizures, those are indeed some of my symptoms. I think microwave weaponry is just one type of directed-energy weapon that they use on me.

Here is a third source willing to on record as this being for real. I say still with some caution and trepidation that this declassified information appears to be for real.

Should the Pentagon Develop a Telepathic Ray Gun? (http://blogs.discovery.com/good_idea/2008/03/should-the-pent.html)

Monday, June 23, 2008

Update: 6:20pm

Something I have forgotten to mention, because I have not been thinking clearly over the weekend and also because I am physically not feeling well, is that they are doing some serious damage to my heart as well. It started with Friday night when I slept at the office, which is on a second-story; they shot at me from below (obviously ground-based) with some very powerful shots at my heart, and my heart/chest area has not felt well since. I have been experiencing chest pains since that time (even when they are not shooting at me) and my body has felt kind of "cold" like not enough blood was pumping. The main thing I want to record is that they continue to shoot me in the heart, not frequently, like "only" 10-20 times a day, but I think with my heart in its current state, every shot is devastating. I was just lying down as I turned over on one side they shot me in the heart, and then they went back to shooting me in the nose. I'd say they're shooting me directly in the heart area about 10-20 times per day including daytime and nighttime.

Right now they are shooting me in the nose as I type this. It's like what you see in the video on this website but much more frequent and more intense.

They've done something related to my internet connection at the house where I rent a room

They've changed something. Before, when I used my FTP client to connect to my server (to post this blog), it would always fail the first time I tried to connect and then succeed thereafter. It's as if the first time I try signals something to probably some corrupt people in the US government watching my site, and then they set up monitoring (or editing? prevention of publishing? misdirection to a website only I can see? Or who knows what) and then let my connection pass through. Starting today it's working normally, connecting on the first time everytime I open the program, which is what it normally should do. I have not updated any software.

Perhaps they are still doing the monitoring or who knows what but have upgraded their system so that now there is no obvious tell-tale sign. This has been one key sign of government interference, but truth is it's very hard to know how deep their web-related meddling really is. If it's government-approved monitoring I guess I don't really have a problem with that, but if it were just that, why even bother? I make everything public on my website anyway. It's not monitoring that I have a problem with, just any tampering or interference with my right as a US citizen to post my beliefs. Nothing I post is classified or inciting violence or such like, so they have no right to interfere with my freedom of the press and freedom of speech as granted in the Constitution or Bill of Rights. Oh wait, I forgot--John Yoo says the Constitution really doesn't matter (see links below). He's appearing before Congress on June 26, in 3 days, and I encourage everyone to tune in and watch it on C-SPAN if they have access to that (that is if they show it on C-SPAN, which I hope they do).

Post from earlier in the day

I have a correction to make to yesterday's entry: It was actually all day Thursday that they were shooting me in the brain all day long, causing overheating and inability to think clearly on Friday, Saturday, and at least into the early morning hours of Sunday.

They continue to shoot my brain, although yesterday it was "only" 10-25 shots in the left brain, and 50-100 shots in my frontal lobes. As long as they continue to shoot anywhere at my brain there is the danger of overheating and agression and confusion because of inability to think clearly, so even though I don't feel the same strange way I felt on Friday and Saturday and I still don't feel 100% sure of my thinking and recommend people stay away from me, and for my part I will try to stay away from others.

Mostly yesterday it was pummelling of the nose: about 1500-2000 shots to my nose, in time with my breathing to make it difficult for me to breathe. This estimate includes both day and nighttime abuse.

More madness by our mafia-run government

Commentary: We are all torturers now (http://www.berkeley.edu/news/media/releases/2005/01/06_danner.shtml)

John Yoo's war crimes (http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2008/04/02/yoo/)

The Torture Memo (http://www.washingtonmonthly.com/archives/individual/2008_04/013450.php)

Sunday, June 22, 2008

More (hopefully) temporary brain damage

They were shooting me in the left brain (actually both sides of my brain) Friday at the office as I tried to work, and I remember saying to my sister at some point that I was having headaches, and then later on at some point I felt the "stipple" feeling of the weapon hitting my brain. But by the time I could take precautions with cold packs and such, apparently the damage was done. I felt myself becoming angry and agressive, which is not like me, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. Basically, only just now I feel I'm starting to "come out of it" and probably not even fully yet. This is what happens when your brain is overheated.

I want to say for the record that the mafia is absolutely, 100% responsible for any rude, inappropriate or criminal behavior I may commit while they are shooting me with directed energy in the brain. I will do everything in my power to prevent them from overheating my brain, and everything in my power to not let it have an effect, but there is only so much I can do. These criminals are absolutely responsible for any criminal behavior resulting from their shooting my brain with directed energy weapons. Even worse, the effects do not wear off immediately, and it is worse with the weather being hot in the summer now (makes it that much easier for their weapon to overheat my brain).

If my thinking is still clear enough I will try to post here to let others know when they are targeting my brain and to stay away from me. They have done this in the past--one summer in particular--and I recall the effect lasted for at least a month if not longer. Again I will do all in my power from preventing the criminals from doing this to me but I want to give everyone a "heads up" and also document what they are doing when they shoot me in the brain with directed energy.

Saturday, June 21, 2008

I was sleeping at the office last night and on the second floor, so they were able to shoot at me from below (at least until I moved to the first floor). What's interesting is I blocked the sides of my head and my nose, so then they started shooting my heart. From now on, I will block all three. I consider these three areas "first tier" because you really need them to stay alive. All the remaining places, which I'm sure they will target, are basically "second tier" in the sense that as horrible as they may be they are probably not life threatening.

Some good news for other innocent victims of these criminals

So you know how they shoot you while you're in the car, trying to drive? I have found a nice remedy. Open completely your two front windows, and even put your hand outside of the driver side window, along the side of your car (you know how people do that when they are relaxed). You will create a large "wind tunnel" in the car that makes it much harder for them to visualize you.

More good news: These gel packs that become "instant cold" are really helpful for stopping the head attacks. I highly, highly recommend them. Just wear them all the time and they do stop whatever it is the criminals are doing when they attacks the sides of our heads. Especially helpful while sleeping.

Did I see their directed-energy weapon?

Not long ago someone posted a comment on my You Tube video (see my Activism page--click on the tab) asking whether I had ever seen the directed energy weapon they use on us. I said "No," but last night while being attacked my memory was "jarred" a bit and I remember on two occasions seeing something weird. It's worth mentioning because I saw it twice--once on Long Island, New York, and once here in Southern California. In both cases, it appeared to be a weapon or something that was being held by the driver of vehicle near to me. What it was is a long, black, metal tube looking thing: It gave me the impression of a gun with an extremely long, cylindrical barrel (like 1-2 feet long). Whether or not this was a directed energy weapon, or just some sort of decoy, I don't know. I think it's not only possible, but probable, that they have many versions of this weapon, including large versions for deployment from planes and such above, and smaller, handheld versions (with maybe only one or two "shots") for deployment by criminals on the ground and in cars.

Friday, June 20, 2008

So last night while I tried to sleep they were doing this: First they try to suffocate me (shooting at my nose), and when I block that, they shoot at the most convenient side of my head (at my brain, causing headaches), so now I have to block both attacks simultaneously, which proved difficult until I reassembled my "steel tunnel", which seems to work fine at the task. This tunnel is better than the old one, though, so I think I won't have the same problems that I had before.

Apparently, they are very angry at me, which happens when you don't like pesky whistleblowers like me telling the truth. Long live the truth!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

They've been shooting me in the left brain (at the left side of my head) all day, causing headaches. Finally I am wearing a cold pack and feel better.

A word to scientists

I think there are many patriotic scientists working in defense and in other areas of our government that don't realize what is going on: That the technology they develop and test is being used to torture innocent American civilians like myself and other innocent civilians throughout the world, I believe.

I understand completely the very lucrative and unique opportunities that the American defense industry offers, and I also understand the need to defend our troops, and the feeling of patriotism that comes with working for the good of our country. The problem is, corrupt people--I believe "mafia" types--are secretly running the government of our great country and using the military might of our country to torture and maim innocent people who run afoul of their selfish plans. They use technology intended for the defense of America to attack and torture innocent Americans who have committed no crime. For those of you considering working for the military/defense in a scientific/research/engineering capacity, I ask you this question: Do you really know what happens to the technology you develop after you develop it? Do you yourself really know everywhere, and in every way, the fruits of your research are used? And if you cannot honestly answer "Yes", and that it is never used against civilians, then I ask you to reconsider your choice to work for the military.

Don't misunderstand me: Our great country needs defense, we need technology, we need to defend our country and our troops. But right now we have an extreme problem with corruption at the very top, and innocent people are being mamed, tortured and murdered by the corrupt people at the top using the very technology meant to defend what America stands for, not to make a travesty of it. I am saying that until America is cured of this disease called the mafia, we need to put a moratorium on military technological development. We need to put an end to the corruption, clean house, and then get back to research and innovation, knowing that the fruits of that innovation will no longer be used to torture innocent Americans.

I am one of the people being tortured by advanced, military-developed directed energy weapons. I have committed no crime. If I have committed some crime, then let me be arrested and have my day in court. But we see in the news that our government does not care about charging people they think have done something wrong with crimes, nor about due process, as evidenced by the treatment of Guantanamo "detainees". I ask you, the potential or current employee for American military/defense, to think about this before joining the military/defense-related company/agency and developing the latest greatest weapon that, unbeknownst to you, ends up being used purposely, premeditatedly to inflict great, continual suffering on innocent Americans.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

They shot me directly in the heart several times this morning while I was sitting here working on my computer.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Well, I thought these mafia monsters had seen the light yesterday and were going to leave me alone, but it turns out I was completely wrong. Basically, I went without sleep for 48 hours, and so they didn't attack because they were just waiting for me to lie down. When I finally did, they brutally and viciously attacked my nose and suffocated me to the point where my heart was racing and giving me palpitations due to lack of oxygen. This does permanent damage to my heart and lessens its longevity, eventually resulting in early death due to heart attack. These disgusting criminal monsters are human garbage and apparently always will be. Apparently it wasn't enough to murder my father; they are set on murdering me as well. They have already murdered years of my life, as it is, but they are still not satisfied. I am convinced now that these criminals will never change their ways and that the only thing that will stop them is their deaths or incarceration. Not that I would ever take matters into my own hands. I have always believed in the rule of law, and I've been thinking lately that maybe the reason my father didn't tell me the truth is because he didn't want me to take revenge and take matters into my own hands. At any rate, that is something I would never do. Still, I hope every day and every minute for the death or incarceration of these animals, because quite simply nothing else will stop them from continuing to inflict permanent serious damage on my heart and the rest of my body. I hope and pray that someday there is justice.

More madness by our mafia-run government

Probe: Pentagon lawyers sought harsh interrogation

Obama on Vet Drug Tests: 'Outrageous'; Meanwhile WH Slams ABC News Report. Senators Barack Obama and John Cornyn Are Calling for an Investigation Into Government Tests of Suicide-Linked Drugs on Veterans

'Disposable Heroes': Veterans Used To Test Suicide-Linked Drugs. An ABC News and Washington Times Investigation Reveals Vets Are Being Recruited for Government Tests on Drugs with Violent Side Effects

U.S. abuse of detainees was routine at Afghanistan bases

'If the detainee dies you're doing it wrong'

Monday, June 16, 2008

Not much to report. Some shooting at my nose while trying to sleep, but I wasn't in bed very long. I feel a bit better physically. Very tired. Didn't sleep much.

I am sad when I think about my dad but am trying to remember the good times.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

My dad definitely did sneeze twice before he fell off the ladder. The only reason I remember is because the two sneezes were fitful, forceful. Consistent with the kind of sneeze I have experienced when being shot in the nose, at a certain intensity and coherency of beam, with their directed energy weapon.

I would be willing to bet anything that they murdered my father. It actually makes everything start to make a little sense now: Why they were stalking me when I was so young, why they kept saying "What do you know?" and so on. It all starts to make sense. This New York based mafia murdered my father.

I do remember also that at my father's funeral there were a lot of shady-looking gangster types including Italian-looking ones. These were people I had never seen before in my life and have not seen since.

Physical update

Consistent also with my discovery of the truth, the criminals turned right away to shooting me in the left brain yesterday repeatedly and consistently all day and into the night while I tried to sleep. At night while lying down they shot the weapon along my arm so I could feel what they were doing to my brain. It felt like someone was poking my arm with a small finger. I guess when someone learns the truth that your gang murdered his father, you want to do all you can to hurt that person.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Pounded and pounded and pounded on my nose last night while I tried to sleep. Fighting for air. The criminals also targetted my heart some as well.

I think the criminals may have murdered my father

If you've read my blog you know all my troubles with these mafia criminals started with my father, with these criminals thinking he said something to me he didn't. But if memory servers me, I think maybe I know what they thought he said to me.

My dad fell off a ladder when I was 12 years old. He was a general contractor and used to doing construction and getting on ladders. I remember I was in my underwear at the time and downstairs nearest to him. He was on a ladder working on the roof. The ladder was outside on our back porch, which was solid concrete surrounding a pool.

If my memory serves me correctly, I remember him sneezing twice before he suddenly fell backwards off the ladder. So I am thinking now that these mafia criminals shot him in the nose with this directed energy weapon, which in turn caused him to fall off the ladder and hit the concrete with his head, shoulder and neck. I remember him bleeding out of the back of his head. He was delirious. I also remember it took four men to hold him down. My father was a strong man.

Why they shot him in the nose, if this is the case, I don't know. I will tell you that he was never the same. He developed cancer in that neck/shoulder area, and the doctors think that the trauma of the fall was why. He eventually died of cancer in 1987, but not before several horrible surgery, including surgery to remove his larynx. For many years he had to "burp" in order to speak.

I think the reason why the mafia has hunted and me tortured me so long is they don't want people to know the truth: They murdered my father.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Today's physical update

Shooting my stomach quite a bit; and probably as a result of this, my bowel movements turned yellow again. Also shot me in the right side of the head, the anus, an eye, and an ear. I have forgotten to mention in recent posts that over the last 3-5 days I have been experiencing ringing in my ears when I lie down to sleep.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Today's physical update

Heavy attacks on my nose all night long while I tried to sleep. Lots of suffocation (i.e., interference with my breathing). The criminals also shot me in the stomach and anus while I was lying down trying to sleep. In the nose attacks, again they came extremely close to my eyes or shot right through them, and my eyes are sore right now after just getting up.

Yesterday night the criminals did heavy shooting of my nose while I was pushing a shopping cart in the (mostly unpopulated) supermarket. My body was fighting for oxygen. Then when I got home I was having breathing difficulties (scary shortness of breath) even when the criminals had apparently stopped the nose attacks (I wasn't experiencing any spasms). Whether the shortness of breath was due to damage they did to my body while in the supermarket, or whether they were attacking me with some other kind of directed energy that doesn't make me spasm but suffocates, I don't know. They also shot me in the nose while I was driving yesterday.

Over the past few days I have been experiencing a "tingling, rushing sensation" on both the left and right sides of my head that might be a very very small seizure.

I forgot to mention in yesterday's entry that when I got up yesterday morning, one of my eye's eyelids was stuck to the top of the eye for several seconds (it was "stuck open").

Strange things in China

I remembered last night that while I was being viciously attacked in Beijing with directed energy weapons, I saw something very strange. Every night when I got home to my apartment in East Beijing, on the 6th floor (the highest floor of the building I lived in), if I went to my window in my bedroom I saw a strange, bright light that just remained "stuck" in the western part of the night's sky. It was so bright and fixed, like a star, but much, much too big and close to be a star. And it sat there fixed in the sky from 10:00pm until daylight every night. Possibly it was some sort of satellite in perfect geosynchronous orbit with my apartment. If so, whether it was there to spy on me, or attack me, or for what purpose I am not sure.

I am certain that I was attacked with directed energy weapons by my next door neighbors in China. They would pound on the walls and make all sorts of noise, and put something against the wall that sounded like something heavy and metal. They were also always leaving a "drippy mess" on the stairs. When I wasn't around they must have carried something down the stairs that contained dirty liquid. Maybe it was runoff from the device(s) they used to either visualize me or torture me. I am sure that any kind of directed energy weapon needs cooling, and for that purpose maybe they use water or some sort of coolant. At any rate, these strange "drip" spots were a regular appearance.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Today's physical update

Some nose attacks and attacks on the left side of my head. Yesterday I made a bowel movement that was dark green. I didn't eat any vegetables or anything that was dark green.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Today's physical update

Lots and lots of nose attacks and attacks on the left side of my head last night. Over the last week I have noticed a very sharp decline in my vision; everything is getting darker, and it's getting more difficult to see. There are many possible reasons but I think it's because in the criminals' never ending quest to suffocate my nose, they either shoot directly through a portion of my eyes, or come dangerous close. The fallout alone, I think, is quite detrimental to my eyes. Another possible explanation is that they succeeded, through continued sleep deprivation brought on by nose suffocation, to give me diabetes and that the vision loss is related to that; but I am not fainting, so I am apt to think it's more related to the first matter.

Another serious matter, which has been going on over the last several weeks, is that my "poo" (sorry to have to mention it) has now consistently all become "yellow" in color. It's hard to know if this is a direct side effect of the criminals' never-evending directed energy abuse, or if it is a symptom of some disease they have induced in me. I don't have the best health insurance (I have a $4000 deductible) and while they continue to kill me with directed radiation, it doesn't make a lot of sense for me to keep running to the doctor, because even if the doctor finds something, I have no chance of recovery while the criminals continue to attack me viciously with directed energy.

Monday, June 9, 2008

Today's physical update

Just lots and lots of nose attacks last night and through the night.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Thoughts about China

As those of you know who have read my blog extensively, I've lived in China for a year, and experienced oppression in China firsthand. Obviously I have an opinion on what is going on now with the Olympics and all. I just want to get a few things off my chest.

China wants to present a good image of itself to the world; it wants to be respected among the various nations and peoples of the world, and as such thinks that the Olympics would be a good venue to do this. (And let me be clear: When I say "China" I mean the Chinese government.) The problem is, China seems to be more concerned with "image" than its actions and behavior. China will never have the respect it so greatly desires so long as it continues to oppress the people within its borders.

I am not sure why certain leaders in China think that a big fireworks show and lots of Olympic gold medals will make the world respect them, while China goes on arresting and bullying people who dare to speak their minds, and acting heavy-handedly where other nations (in the same situation) would not. Let me give you a recent example:

China blocks quake school protesters (June 3, 2008)

If you visit the above link you'll read a recent news article about how Chinese police dragged away parents who were protesting for some answers regarding the deaths of their children in the recent earthquake tragedy. It is possible that their children may have died because of inferior construction materials in school buildings. Journalists on the scene were also dragged away. Apparently, this is all done in an effort to present a positive image of China to the world. But--and somehow China doesn't understand this--it has just the opposite effect. When you oppress your citizenry, and foreign journalists; when you behave in an authoritarian and oppressive manner; when you forcibly remove parents grieving over the loss of their only children, then you lose the respect of the world, not gain it.

There is something that every schoolchild in America is taught, at an early age: Actions speak louder than words. Actions also speak louder than controlled media, or fireworks displays, or gold medals. China, if you want to be seen as a modern, human-rights respecting nation, then behave that way. Nothing short of changing your behavior will attain that goal for you. What if, instead of dragging away grieving parents, police went out to greet them and said: "We understand your great sorrow. We are truly sorry for the loss of your children in this great tragedy. We will get to the bottom of any corruption that may be involved." What if, instead of using physical force, the police and other officials engaged in dialogue with the suffering parents? Then relations between the police and the citizens would be improved; then journalists would report a positive interaction between police and citizens; and the world would see a positive side of China rather than a negative one.

For me it's strange to see a country like China, so rich in historical and literary philosophy and wisdom, with leaders that seem to be missing the point. Less is more. You'll get that out of the Tao de Ching, out of Taoism, very clearly out of the writings of Lao Tzu and Zhuang Tzu and others. Often doing less--that is, being less forceful, using less violence--achieves more peace and more respect from the world than using more force and violence would.

Public opinion is like water. Smash it with your fist, you cannot break it; hold it in your hand tightly, it seeps out. You cannot control it. No one can. No matter how many walls, how many fortresses, how many soldiers. No government and no nation can control every event, quell every protest, ensure every outcome. You cannot do it, and it is better not to try, for in the trying you are seen as oppressive, and you achieve the very thing you hoped to avoid.

Now, right now, is an extremely pivotal moment and great opportunity for China. It is very true that the world's eyes are upon you; how much more important, then, to be above reproach; to behave in a way that is unquestionably benevolent; and to show by action and behavior that China is a nation that respects human rights. It is a great thing indeed if China can host a spectacular opening ceremony and win many gold medals; but how much greater it is to show that China is a nation that values respect, tolerance and human decency. Because in the long run, in the long-term course of things, other nations won't care how many gold medals China won in 2008, or how spectacular its opening ceremony was, but rather how well it treated the people within its borders--the many athletes, visitors, journalists and of course, its own citizens. Better to let people protest, if they do so non-violently, than to quash a protest violently, forcefully and be seen as an oppressor; better to give some freedom and show that China is a country that above all things respects human rights, than to hammer out all interruptions and lose the respect of the world.

No doubt there are many challenges ahead for China as we lead up to and enter the Olympics; and now is a key time to show that China is a tolerant and patient nation. China made promises of open access to journalists and news crews, and to give them live coverage; I encourage China to do this. Instead of trying to tightly control every second of the Olympics, if China should instead allow freedom and free access, and show tolerance and patience and wisdom, then perhaps this Olympics could indeed be a bright spot in China's history, rather than a dim one. At this pivotal time, China will be judged by both what it does and does not do, most especially under conditions of "trouble" or unrest. I encourage China to take the path of non-violence, tolerance and patience, and in so doing reap dividends greater than any truckful of gold medals ever could.

Today's physical update

Right now they are shooting me in the nose in such a way as to make me sneeze (I believe this is a lighter, more dispersed beam that causes that). Also after I got up (pretty late today) they were shooting me in the left side of the head. Last night, while I was lying down, they predominantly shot my nose to suffocate me, but also there was shooting in the right side of my head and at my heart area, and also one or two shots at my right ear and at my stomach. When I lie on my left side, with my right side facing up, the side facing up (right) tends to be attacked, and if I lie on my right, with my left side facing up, my left side tends to be attacked. I believe this is because they are attacking from above.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Heavy, heavy attacks on the left side of my head yesterday, last night and while I was trying to sleep last night. Experienced strong heating of the left side of my head. I covered with my hand to let my hand absorb some of the radiation (heat). But I found something very helpful too: They have "instant cold packs" that you can buy at the supermarket. You just squeeze them and they become very cold. These instant cold packs proved very, very helpful! I wish they were around years and years ago.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Today's physical update

Last night I spent the night at the office. The criminals attacked me while I was trying to sleep. They also attacked me on the drive to work yesterday, and just now on the drive home, in particular shooting me in the left brain as I was trying to drive home. Attacking me with directed energy weapons while I am trying to drive is endangering not only my life but everyone else's on the road and on the highway.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Today's physical update

Well, they've been shooting me in the left brain a lot. Just now, in fact, and also last night as I was trying to watch television. Also shot me in the nose yesterday while I was trying to drive. Of course still doing nose attacks while I try to sleep at night. I have not yet set up a camera to film me while I sleep, but I will soon. Also, this morning, while still in bed, they shot me in the right eye.

I realize that a laundry list of everything they do to me might not be of interest to everyone, so soon I will start a new blog just for recording what they do physically to me.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Today's physical update

Well, the criminals have been doing a lot of attacks/suffocation on my nose while I sleep. I'm going to set up a camera while I sleep so that others can see what's going on. In case you haven't already seen it, go to my activism page or search my name on YouTube to get a small sample of what nose attacks look like. The good news is, while I'm awake, they've really lightened up or stopped the attacks, probably out of fear that I'll make more movies (evidence) of it. So to all others out there in my shoes, I highly recommend making videos showing the effect of what they do.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Today's physical update

This morning they shot me in the back of the head (with the popping and so forth) just as I was waking up. They were also doing it last night as I tried to go to sleep. Today they were shooting me in the nose as I was trying to drive the car.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Recently a true hero of the Holocaust passed away, Irena Sendler. She risked her life (and was imprisoned and tortured) to save the lives of 2500 Jewish children from the Warsaw Ghetto. It's people like Irena that make me feel better about this world. We need more like her in this world.

Irena Sendler, Polish Holocaust Hero, Dies at 98

Sunday, June 1, 2008

I realize now that the mafia attacking me might be the New York area mafia; and I say this because two people send me, with a span of years in between, things that suggest that. One was named Crystal; this girl was probably a "mafia princess" or some such well-connected person. I hurt once and only once by screaming at her over the phone when she was being rude. I apologize to her in writing three times, but no apology was ever good enough for her, and she ended up being part of the equation (more like an excuse for the mafia) that the mafia used to rationalize torturing me. I never did anything to her but scream at her once over the phone; she in turn hung up on my answering machine hundreds of times, screamed at me over the phone, both home phone and work phone, left a death threat on my answering machine, followed and stalked me (courtesy of the mob) from state to state, steered her car in front of mine and hit the brake to force me to the side of the road, and on, and on, and on. Never did get her last name, but I knew her from a job; she worked in Albuquerque, New Mexico at a temp agency there called Adia Personnel from 1990-1991.

My scream was this: "I told Roger I was working over at XYZ hospital!" (Not actually "XYZ" but the name of a local hospital in Albuquerque; she was giving me the Spanish Inquisition treatment about why I hadn't called their company and threatening me with the loss of employment, something that is no joke in one of the poorest cities in America where minimum-wage jobs were the most prevalent, at least back in 1990-91. I don't know what Albuquerque is like now.) But her death threat was this (said in a horror-movieish stupid evil voice): "You're gonna die on Friday. Come to New York City." So that was the first indication New York had anything to do with it.

Another indication was in 2006 from a girl who shall remain nameless. She came up to me and completely out of context said, "I have friends in New York." At the time I didn't get her drift, and said, "That's nice." Later I realized that she was probably talking about the mob, and in her misguided way trying to help me. So those are two instances of the NY mob connection. There have been some others which I won't discuss now, and of course, the whole mafia hit sign thing which has been going on for years.

Brain stuff

I don't think I ever talked about in detail what happened while I was at the University and the whole thing with the Ron and Carol Harris wonder twins. I did mention there role in my being viciously attacked, but I think I didn't go into the details of the attack. What the mobster lunatic did was shoot the directed energy beam into the left side of my brain directly, intensely, and kept it targeted there for what at least seemed like 15-20 seconds. I could literally hear the brain cells "popping", immenses continous popping. And the key thing here is that he (I'm assuming a he, but I don't know that) did this just as I was waking up, just as my mind was transitioning from an unconscious to a conscious state. Hell of a way to be woken up. More than that, though, I think he did some at least temporary brain damage, because for a while I couldn't think straight, couldn't contain my anger, just went crazy. I tried, tried, tried hard to keep my emotions in check but it was extremely difficult. One other thing I forgot to mention: This attack happened in the extremely hot summer month of August (in 2005, I think); the heat makes everything worse.

Now the important thing to remember here is that I had nothing, mind you, NOTHING AT ALL to bother these NY military-involved mafia people. Nothing at all. I wasn't publishing a website as I am now; I wasn't talking to anyone about them; just the opposite. I kept quiet and just pursued my studies. You see where it got me. The important lesson here is this: If you're thinking about appeasing the mob, it won't get you anywhere. It won't stop them for one second from blasting you in the brain. So just say "No" to appeasement. Don't appease them, and use your life in a way that is beneficial to all mankind by speaking up against these people. They're gonna torture you and maim you, anyway. It's not enough to be silent and mind your own business, as you can see from my example. And if you're thinking about joining them, and swearing omerta and all that nonsense, not only is that an extremely selfish thing to do that betrays all decent people, but my guess you can probably expect the same amount of respect they've showed me over the many years, which is to say, none at all. This mafia's actions show that in their minds you are nothing but a piece of meat that can be controlled at whim with their high-tech weapons.

Back to the story. I lost my temper, and started driving as offensively as the mob did (they would shine their bright lights at me, so I would shine my brights at them, and so on). Then an Italian-looking "Mr. Mafia" dude shows up in a local department store wearing an all black suit and staring at me menacing for a minute. (I never saw the dude before in my life). Around this time also I was actually inside the school library and they shot me in the right brain (and I refused to get up and move) until my head was literally hot to the touch. I refused to move. I finally got up and walked outside and some guys drove by in a screeching car and shouted "ICE!" to me, as if I should put ice on my head, but I never did. They don't get to control my actions, just my physical body.

Soon after this (this was all in August 2005-October 2006) I was in bed and they shot me in the carotid artery in my neck. I went lame for two months or so. Not kidding. I walked with a limp for two months or so until it ever so slowly got better. I guess they had given me a small stroke, which is something they have also done lately just by continually energy directed at my head, left brain and nose. (They've started doing left brain attacks again lately). I fully expect a major stroke and/or heart attack to come. But I will continue to publish as much as I am able. Also, because I have just told all these historical truths, I fully expect them to do all of things I have just published here again to me now; this is what they typically do to discourage whistleblowers like myself from telling the truth. Too bad; the truth is too important to be silenced or deferred. They can do what they like.

I realize now that life is always an endless quest for freedom against those who would take those freedoms away. Like Patrick Henry, I say, "Gave me liberty or give me death."

 
 
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